


Pain

by AStateOfMindOverMatter



Category: The Evil Within (Video Game)
Genre: (Because its Ruvik), Grinding, M/M, Mind Manipulation, Not sure if its dub-con or not but Joseph likes it in the end, PWP (with some plot to it), Restraints, Theres a point where Ruvik basically eats out a gunshot wound, Torture, Wound Play, a bit of a blood kink on Ruvik's side if we're being honest here, mind games (kinda), those parts are interesting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-25 21:17:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17128910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AStateOfMindOverMatter/pseuds/AStateOfMindOverMatter
Summary: After Kidman's betrayal Joseph eventually wakes up in a dark room all alone, strapped to an operating table that he's certain he will meet his end on. Ruvik seems to believe otherwise.





	Pain

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas and happy holidays yall. Read the notes at the end of this for a bit of extra info.

 

Pain.

Deep and aching pain is what Joseph registers first. It trails like the tail end of flames licking at the wound on his shoulder, pulses with sickening warmth that makes him shudder.

The second thing he registers is how dry his throat is; and when he opens his mouth to try and breathe, he only manages to cough and choke on the dust settling in the air.

The last thing he notices is when he opens his eyes, that it's dark all around him. He’s laying on something cold; and he knows because it's seeping in through the back of his vest, chilling his skin.

The memories hit him like a train cart, looped together so securely, but fast enough to derail entirely.

_Sebastian. Sebastian and Kidman. Kidman with a gun to Leslie’s head._

He clenches his teeth and groans, the pain in his shoulder continuing to radiate a gross kind of warmth that only worsens the longer it aches.

_Leslie screaming. The world crumbling around them and a bullet in his shoulder._

Joseph flinches at the memory of its impact, but it fires up his adrenaline. He tries to move yet his limbs don't budge. Before he can really question _why_ he realizes there are straps around his wrists, and metal clamps against his ankles.

His eyes widen, and he tugs at the straps wildly at first, grinding his teeth together at the way his shoulder throbs. He groans, and for a split-second, it feels like the bullet could still be _inside._ He imagines metal sliding against bone and chokes on air, gasping for breath as the room whirls around him in his panic.

 _‘It’s not real.’_ He reminds himself.

 _‘It’s not. It can’t be any more real than you’re making it.’_ That’s a lie, but it settles him well enough to get his heart rate to slow.

His eyes are still adjusting to the dark, but it feels almost like he’s underwater. His eyes are moving too rapidly to focus on any particular point, disorienting him further. It feels like the room is spinning, he can’t even clutch his ears when the headaches come.

Wordlessly cruel _screeching_ makes his head feel like it's about to burst, his temples pulsing and his fingers twitching in their restraints. He feels a stream of warmth trail from his nose to his mouth, only realizing its blood when he licks his lips and tastes something warm and metallic.

Joseph blinks rapidly when the headache starts to clear, and his eyes have thankfully, _mercifully,_ adjusted. He lifts his head up as much as possible, ignoring the spike of pain that shoots up his shoulder in an attempt to try and see where he might be _now,_ but for the most part it seems like a dim… _lair_ , for lack of a better word.

His hands clench, and he pulls at his restraints. His shoulder appears to still be slowly oozing blood, but thankfully it seems to have slowed to more of a trickle.

Belatedly, he ends up realizing he’s strapped down to what looks like an operating table. His stomach floods with anxiety, and he tugs harder, flinching when pain grips his shoulder again.

He’s not going to be able to do _anything_ like this.

There’s a distant creaking sound, and fear latches onto him, cold and painful as his whole body stills. He’s completely immobilized right now; Strapped down and wounded, he thinks he can see a faint outline of a door to the far left, and he stares at it till he sees spots in the darkness. Anything could come prancing in to kill him, he’s acutely aware of this fact. Feels the sweat break out on the back of his neck as a result of it, too.

The silence draws on and on, as does the anticipation and fear. Joseph feels his heart rate ratchet up again with the paranoia. It’s a miracle he hasn’t gone cross-eyed yet.

“Just look at you.”

Joseph’s whole body jolts at the sudden, familiar voice, his head whirling back and forth to try and spot anyone in the darkness.

“..R-Ruvik?” He croaks. Good _god,_ his throat hurt. Scratch that, his _everything_ hurt. A deep chuckle seems to bleed from the walls, he can’t tell where he’s supposed to look-- where he _wants_ him to look.

“ Very observant of you, _detective._ ” The voice mocks. It’s as if it’s actually _in_ his mind now, because as much as he’s trying to look around, he’s just not _seeing_ anyone. It’s chipping away at his nerves more than he’d like to admit.

As if he’d read his mind, suddenly Ruvik flickers into existence near the end of the operating table, glaring at Joseph from under his hood with a sort of cold indifference in his eyes.

“Ruvik-!” Joseph rasps, his expression turning into a hard glare as he yanks against the restraints again. He’ll never get used to the sight.

“Ah, ah, ah.” He tuts, “ So ready to throw away any inhibitions now, detective? What’s the matter, are you _that_ excited to get your hands on me?” Ruvik drifts away from the foot of the table, ambling up closer to where Joseph’s head is.

Anger is bubbling up in his stomach, hot and fiery as he makes eye-contact with Ruvik. He has to turn his head to hold that intense stare. Even the fear that grips him isn’t enough to make him stop.

“I don’t want my hands any- anywhere _near_ you.” He stutters in the middle of his sentence, pausing to clench his teeth and _breathe_ when his shoulder tenses, sending pain all the way down his arm. Ruvik seems to pick up on this, the corners of his mouth turning up in passing.

“What’s the matter? Poor little Joseph still hurting from Kidman’s little... _betrayal_?” Joseph flinches at Kidman’s name, whispered flush against his ear. It doesn't go unpunished, because his shoulder throbs in response to his sharp movements.

“Look at you;” Ruvik seems to scoff. “You don’t even know the _meaning_ of betrayal.” Suddenly, Ruvik’s smile is gone, and instead, there’s a fire in his eyes that subjectively terrifies Joseph-- a familiar flame, to say the least.

For a brief moment, Joseph thinks of Sebastian, how easily he would get fired up and invested into something. He’d always know something was about to go down when he’d seen that rowdy spark in his eyes.

Ruvik holds that same spark, now. It’s a comparison that feels almost insufferable to realize. He stuffs the thought into a faraway corner of his mind, disgusted that he could even compare the two of them in any way.

Ruvik smiles knowingly, but without amusement, and disappears from his vision, and before he can even try to turn his head a rough hand grabs his jaw and yanks his head to the right. Joseph gasps at the sharp throb of pain in his shoulder from being jostled, looking up at Ruvik’s face, now mere inches from his own, and seeing the look of malice that coats his stark features.

“ Oh,” He breathes warmly against Joseph’s skin. “But you _will._ ” He finishes, his voice low and thick with bitter hatred. The words make the hairs on the back of Joseph’s neck stand up, and he feels like he can’t even speak. Fear grips tightly at him even as Ruvik stands up, and takes a few slow steps away.

The restraints around his wrists feel like they’ve tightened, and Joseph tugs at them hopelessly, not taking his eyes of Ruvik’s back for even a second.

“Tell me, Joseph.” He starts, low voice already dipping lower. “Does it hurt? Knowing that despite all your desperate hoping, despite all your pathetic _pleading,_ that there just isn’t any way out this time?” Ruvik starts to slowly circle around him much the same way a predator would, just waiting for the right moment to lunge.

“Does it hurt, knowing there’s just no happy ending out there for you?” Ruvik ambles closer, staring holes into Joseph’s eyes as he draws nearer.

 _‘He’s trying to get in your head.’_ Joseph grits his teeth.’ _Don’t let him.’_

“ Oh, but I’m _already there._ ” Suddenly Ruvik’s breath is hot against his ear, and Joseph flinches hard enough to make the table rattle. He hisses in pain, and Ruvik chuckles warmly, as if genuinely amused. Joseph barely has time to recuperate before a hand comes to rest on his stomach, making him gasp in alarm and jolt anew. Ruvik pulls his hand away, letting it rest by his side again.

“Subject seems to be hypersensitive to external stimulation; shows signs of extreme paranoia and reacts violently to being touched,” Ruvik states simply, filling Joseph with unease at the fact it sounds like he’s taking _notes._

“Are--” He flinches at the sound of his voice, now. “-Are you-- Are you _studying_ me?” He asks, regretting it not a moment later when Ruvik’s eyes return to his own, nearly sparkling with bad intentions.

No. he _couldn’t_ be taking notes, this was just another thing to get under his skin. He already knew this game.

Ruvik doesn’t respond, simply looking away from Joseph’s face, and trailing his eyes down his body instead-- which is, objectively, _much_ more terrifying in Josephs opinion. At least he could kind of garner what Ruvik was thinking when he responded, but the silent staring is what’s really beginning to gnaw through his nerves.

The same hand as before decisively settles on his stomach, and Joseph still flinches, but not as violently. Ruvik gives a detached hum, but when those same marred fingertips come to fiddle with the top button of his vest, Joseph’s eyes widen.

Ruvik undoes the first button, and Joseph’s mouth opens without his permission.

“What are-- What are you _doing?_ ” He damn near squawks, eyes burning holes into Ruvik’s when the other man turns to make eye contact, before silently undoing the second one.

“Stop it!” Joseph tugs at the restraints, his shoulder pulsing with dull, throbbing pain now. Ruvik’s hands come up to his tie, beginning to un-knot it from around Joseph’s neck.

“Who are you, to order me around?” Ruvik replies, making goosebumps raise on Josephs’ arms as he tugs on his tie; not hard enough to pull him up, but enough to warn. He leaves it untied and un-does the third button of his vest. Joseph opens his mouth to speak, but no words come out. Ruvik continues, going for the dress shirt underneath it and exposing pale, once unblemished skin. The longer the silence draws on, the colder the pit in Josephs’ stomach grows. Soon enough, Ruvik is peeling away blood-dampened fabric from his gunshot wound, making Joseph flinch and clench his teeth together.

“Fascinating.”

It’s the first thing Ruvik has said in the last five minutes, and it's somehow the most concerning yet. Joseph blinks up at him with wide, fearful eyes.

“..Does it still hurt?” Ruvik asks, looking away from the wound, and into Joseph’s eyes instead. The question surprises him a little, stalling the fear in his chest for a split second before it returns, icy and sharp.

“Why… Why would I--” Joseph stammers, at a loss for words. “Why would I answer that?” He gets out. It seems _well past_ obvious what the answer is, anyways. Ruvik’s eyes glint dangerously, and one of his hands comes up to rest over the wound, momentarily stopping Joseph's breathing before he _squeezes_ either side of the open wound, much like you would a pimple. Blood squelches out of it in thick globs, and Joseph's head rears back against the metal operating table, connecting with an audible thud. He grinds his teeth together and nearly screams, the sound coming out muffled through his lips.

Ruvik’s hand leaves the wound with blood coating his fingertips. Joseph feels like the room is moving again, and he looks up at Ruvik blearily, seeing his pale eyes narrow with smug interest.

“Does it still hurt, Detective?” He asks again. Joseph lets his head fall back against the table, letting out a low groan. That isn't a good enough answer for Ruvik, because he rests his fingers near the wound again, making Joseph visibly tense. When he pushes fate and still doesn't answer, Ruvik smiles and traces his index finger around the open wound.

_Don’t give in. Don’t tell him anything._

Ruvik plunges his finger into the wound, making Joseph’s whole body tense, and convulse simultaneously. White, _white_ -hot pain frays Joseph’s nerves, and he _actually_ screams because, oh god, he can feel them _digging into him_ and-

Ruvik pulls his finger out, breathing in deeply through his nose. His eyes close in a way that almost seems relaxed, but Joseph hardly notices, still arching away and choking on air while he simply tries to breathe again. His stomach is shaking from how tense he is, and if he could, he would have vomited right then.

“Impressive, Detective.” Ruvik mocks, but there’s something off about it. His voice comes out a little bit rushed, and his hand doesn’t stray away from Josephs’ stomach like the other time.

“ _You just keep surprising me.”_ Joseph yelps when Ruvik is at his ear again, still too disoriented from before to really hide his terror. Ruvik lets out a breathy chuckle, tracing his finger around the wound on Joseph’s shoulder again.

“No-” Joseph chokes out, already freezing up in fear, “Stop-!” He gasps out, but Ruvik doesn’t seem to care, dipping the tip of his index finger back inside the wound before pulling it out again. Joseph goes rigid, choking on his own cry of pain as he tries to fold back into the table, away from Ruvik’s prying eyes, and fingers.

“Your pain, or your _fear_ ; I can't tell which is _worse_.” Ruvik sighs quietly, his eyelids fluttering half-closed. Joseph is breathing deeply, trying to will his heart to slow its wild beating.

Ruvik plunges his finger into the wound once again, making Joseph cry out.

Dry, searing pain reflects from the wound now, pulsing and throbbing while Ruvik slides his finger out to the first knuckle, before burying it back into the last. Joseph’s body jerks, his shoulder locking up at the intrusion, making it just _that much_ worse when Ruvik curls his finger and digs it into the muscle. Joseph chokes on a scream, his legs twitching in their restraints while tears well up in his eyes.

It’s horrible, images of open wounds being prodded with needles flooding Joseph's mind as he tries to wriggle away. He’s just barely clinging to consciousness. Surely he must be bleeding out, now; but Ruvik just keeps _going,_ basically thrusting his finger in and out of the wound with a look akin to razor-sharp interest, and strangely enough, _curiosity._

Joseph’s world is dimming in flashes, and his throat is raw from all the screaming he’s been doing, but Ruvik finally stops, withdrawing his blood-slicked finger before examining it.

“An average pain tolerance, so it seems.” Ruvik drawls, his voice coming out almost breathy.

“But I’m still impressed you’re even conscious, _Detective._ ” Joseph flinches, because despite his vision being clouded with tears, he can still string his thoughts together enough to know he doesn't want to listen to any more of Ruvik’s rambling.

Joseph lets his head tilt to the side, eyes fluttering shut. He isn’t sure how long he stays like that, breathing shallowly with his whole body slack against the table. Too soon, a rough hand grips his shoulder and squeezes, Joseph’s eyes fly open before Ruvik is jerking him forward enough to slam him back down on the operating table. He wheezes at the impact, hissing in pain as he squints up at Ruvik through teary eyes.

His mottled face is close to his, and through his blurred vision, he can see Ruvik’s eyes glinting.

“Don’t give up on me yet, Detective. I just said I was impressed, do you want to undo that?” Ruvik’s lips brush his ear, blowing a puff of hot air against his clammy skin before he faces Joseph again, still too close when the corners of his lips turn up.

 _He’s enjoying this too much._ Joseph cringes away, eyebrows still furrowed down into a scowl of pain. He wasn't sure _what else_ he should have expected, though.

“You’re absolutely _right,_ Detective,” Ruvik whispers into his ear, making Joseph try to tilt his head away out of reflex. He doesn’t manage it well enough before a calloused hand is gripping his jaw, keeping his head from turning unless it's to actually _look_ at Ruvik, which is something Joseph really doesn’t want to do now.

“I’m enjoying myself _far_ too much,” He continues, nosing against Joseph's temple in a gesture that would be considered innocent in any other context.

“You’re-- You’re _sick._ ” Joseph rasps, his throat dry and hurting. He feels nauseous, the sickened feeling swirling in the pit of his stomach intensifies when Ruvik chuckles against his skin, stroking a thumb over Joseph’s jawline while he holds him in place.

“Oh?” Ruvik replies, pulling away entirely to stare down at Joseph with piercing eyes. He circles around him, eyes flitting across every inch of him as he does so. It makes him uneasy, but at least he’s still conscious. Joseph clenches his hands into fists, watching Ruvik intently until a scarred hand comes up to rest on his exposed stomach. Joseph flinches unwillingly, watching as his shirt is pushed open further. Ruvik’s hand slides down his skin, to the start of his pants before continuing farther.

Joseph’s breath stalls as he stares, eyes wide while Ruvik drums his fingers over his hip.

“Interesting word choice, Detective.” Ruvik practically _purrs._ His hand comes to rest just above Joseph’s knee, and he pauses a second, before squeezing the bruise just on the outside of his thigh, making him yelp in surprise.

“Still so taken aback?” He hums. “There’s nothing you can hide from me now, _Joseph._ ” He punctuates the statement by digging his fingers into the bruise, and Joseph bites his lip at the ache it causes, hating the way his names sounds on Ruvik’s lips.

What remains unsaid, is that he’d readily take _this_ over anything else.

Ruvik smiles, and it’s just as chilling as Joseph imagined it would be.

His hand is moving away from his outer thigh now, trailing down Joseph’s leg. He jerks against his restraints when blunt nails dig into the scrape on his knee, feeling startled by the reminder the wound is even there.

Joseph’s shoulder is still throbbing from its earlier treatment, but he’s glad to have Ruvik’s eyes elsewhere, at the very least.

Blood is drying on his skin, on his _clothes._ It’s itchy and uncomfortable, but not quite as uncomfortable as the wound that’s bleeding to begin with.

Ruvik seems to find what he’s looking for, because he runs his fingers down the laceration on the side of Joseph’s shin, hidden by his pant leg just like the other injuries. Joseph’s vision goes sharp, and he closes his eyes, not liking the way Ruvik is lingering.

His eyes snap open when nails start digging into his shin, forcing the wound open further. Joseph yelps, and struggles against Ruvik’s hold, clenching his teeth together as he tries to jerk away.

Ruvik tuts softly, still smirking while his hands move away from Josephs shin, coming down to the clasps holding his feet in place instead. He fingers the latch a little, making Joseph tense with helpless anticipation. His chest constricts, and he inhales sharply when Ruvik waves his hand over them, the sound of rusted metal screeching as the clasps break in half.

Joseph flexes his wrists against their still-intact restraints, and his first instinct is to immediately pull his legs up and away from Ruvik, scraping his skin against the now jagged metal of his broken bindings in his haste. The sting makes him flinch, but he instantly forgets about it when Ruvik flickers, suddenly much closer than before. He grabs one of Joseph's ankles, gripping it hard enough to bruise.

“What a skittish pet,” Ruvik sighs, before yanking Joseph's ankle to the side, towards him. It sends Joseph off-balance on the table, and he yelps, struggling to stay flat on his back as he tries to kick at them. His shoulder throbs painfully, just as his ankle does, but he doesn't stop trying to struggle out of their grip.

“Hey-- Let me go!” Joseph hollers, his throat burning just as much as the rest of him. Ruvik grabs his other ankle too, stopping him from kicking. Joseph snarls, barely registering such an animalistic sound coming from his lips as he struggles. For an instant, he manages to yank his leg out of Ruvik's grip, and in a split second, he pulls it back before slamming his heel into his shoulder. Ruvik hisses and the sound is immediately gratifying before his body stills, his struggling stopping abruptly.

Ruvik’s hand closed around his ankle again, grip vice-tight unlike before. Joseph can see the bubbling anger behind those pale eyes, and he clenches his teeth again, trying to move his legs to no avail.

It’s like every muscle in his body decided to stop cooperating, and though Ruvik sets his legs back in the table, Joseph still tries to move-- tries to kick, or even flex, just move _something._ But nothing responds. He’s basically just deadweight.

He tries to speak, but no words come out. Ruvik is staring straight _into_ him, it feels like.

“That wasn’t very kind of you, Detective.” Ruvik circles around the table, stopping at the other side, a little too close to Joseph’s shoulder wound for him to truly be okay with.

“Perhaps you should consider apologizing to me.” He leans over Joseph's chest, staring into his eyes with a sort of animosity that fills his stomach with dread.

Ruvik’s hand slides up his bare chest, pushing away the rumpled fabric again. It’s almost like his touch just ignites some sort of physical response because the throbbing in his shoulder instantly grows _worse._

Joseph takes a shaky breath, nerves jittering when Ruvik runs the pad of his thumb over the still-raw opening of his gunshot wound. He seems to be contemplating something, humming softly before immediately driving his _middle_ finger into the wound as far as it would go.

In an instant, Joseph has control over his body again, arching his back and _screaming_ as the intrusion widens the wound just sightly, straining tissue and muscle as it tries to accommodate the slight stretch. Joseph can feel the throbbing all the way down to his feet as a horrible warmth floods the length of his shoulder. He blinks back the tears in his eyes, looking up blearily to see Ruvik smiling at him.

Joseph sags back against the table, letting his eyes flit closed for a few silent minutes. He hears something moving, and slowly opens his eyes, barely able to focus on anything until he feels a distinct pressure on his lap.

Ruvik leans in close to his face, and Joseph doesn't even have the will, or _strength_ to keep his head up, let alone try to turn away. Their noses are almost touching at this point, and Ruvik’s eyes are glassy with delight. It occurs to him that Ruvik is _sitting_ on him, now.

“Feeling sorry, yet?” He whispers, warm puffs of breath hitting Joseph’s lips with how close they are. Joseph swallows hard, and it _stings._

Ruvik pulls away before he can answer, but he doesn't go far, just dipping down low enough to rest his cheek against Joseph’s chest.

“You’re heart is beating rather quickly, Detective.” Joseph strains his ears to hear Ruvik’s murmuring now, “I wonder if you’re just as excited as I am.” Ruvik whispers against his skin, scarred lips just barely touching Joseph’s collarbone. Joseph’s vision refocuses, and he manages to look down at Ruvik with slightly wide eyes, still exhausted from before.

“Or maybe,” Ruvik breathes, nosing closer to his injured shoulder. “You’re just _afraid._ ” His voice lowers. Joseph’s breath hitches, he can’t even _speak_ before he feels something wet slide over his shoulder wound, making him try to flinch away. Ruvik braces his knees against Joseph’s sides in silent warning, and he tries to stay still-- because right now, he has a feeling anything he tries to do will make things worse for him in the end.

Ruvik hums, obviously pleased with Joseph's obedience, before swiping his tongue over the wound again. His mouth fills with the taste of copper, and he licks his teeth before dipping it back in. Joseph jolts before immediately stilling again on account of Ruvik’s hands, starting to gently pet at his abdomen in something like _praise._

Joseph’s stomach turns, and the pain seizing his shoulder, contrasting with the hands slowly caressing his stomach makes him feel close to vomiting. His shoulder throbs and Ruvik presses his tongue in farther, licking the inside of the wound in a way that is irrevocably disturbing to Joseph. He chokes on a breath, and turns his head to the side, letting out a shuddering exhale as his shoulder pulses.

Ruvik pulls away, and though the feeling of his tongue leaving the wound is uncomfortable at best, the relief that courses through Joseph almost drowns him from how intense it is.

“Submit to me,” He whispers, his lips close to Joseph’s again as he continues to stroke that pale stomach. “I can make you _truly_ useful.” Ruvik gently scratches his nails down their chest, stare burning into darker eyes as he waits, for the first time, for Joseph to finish.

Joseph’s voice is caught in his throat, and he stares up at Ruvik with wide eyes.

“No.” He whispers first, then again, louder “No! Get off of me!” He yells, his voice scathing and scratchy as he bucks his hips, trying to throw the other off before he’s kicking his legs, just trying to do _anything_ with his newfound adrenaline _._

Ruvik dips his head down again, his fingers coming up to roughly grip at Joseph’s jaw, effectively shutting them up as he stares into those eyes.

“Isn’t it such a shame,” Ruvik begins, tone almost conversational, “That you don’t have a _choice”_

Joseph’s stomach drops, and he tries to shake his head free of Ruvik’s grip, stopping just short when a hand comes to rest at the waist of his pants.

Ruvik dips his fingers into the fabric, feeling warm skin hiding just beneath the surface. Now Joseph’s eyes are wide, and a muffled sound of distress immediately escapes him, his struggling renewed as he tries to buck Ruvik off of him-- or at _least_ get him off balance. He’ll take anything at this point.

It doesn’t work, though. Ruvik stays firmly seated overtop of him, staring down in disapproval as he takes to unbuttoning Joseph’s slacks in much in the same way he did to his vest.

His hand falls away from Joseph’s jaw, and the instant it does he’s talking.

“What-- why are you _doing_ this?-” He coughs, his body jolting with the impact. “ _Stop-_ ” He whispers, genuine fear beginning to paint his words, and ragged breathing. The corner of Ruvik’s mouth twitches up at the sound. He leans in, making Joseph flinch away until he can’t anymore, his head flat against the table as Ruvik noses along one high cheekbone. All the way up until his tongue darts out, and traces up his earlobe. Joseph breathes in sharply, going deathly still underneath him, and Ruvik lets out a breathy little laugh in response. The air around them grows terse, and Ruvik’s voice drops dangerously low.

“Because you are _mine._ ” He growls, teeth bared in a terrifying grin. “And I will do with you as I please.” He finishes, his grin vanishing into a more neutral expression.

Ruvik’s calloused fingers slip into Joseph’s now-unbuttoned slacks, pushing the hem of his underwear down to slide his mottled palm against his soft length. Joseph clenches his teeth in a hard gasp, his chest rising in short jerks as he tries not to choke on his own saliva, now mingling with blood the more he coughs and sputters.

“I am your _God._ ” Ruvik whispers, leaning down until his lips are just a hair's breadth from Josephs, no doubt enjoying the way he squirms in discomfort. “Which way would you rather suffer, Dear Joseph. In pleasure, or _pain_?” He continues, whispering into his ear as his hand continues to just run up and down that soft length, up to the point where Joseph is frantically trying to writhe away.

“G-get-- Get _off_ of me--” He whispers, breathing in short, rapid bursts as if he’s about to hyperventilate. Ruvik clicks his tongue in mock annoyance, slipping his hand out of his pants before grabbing at the hem, and pushing them farther down on Joseph’s hips. The smaller man jerks against him, his legs kicking against the table despite Ruvik still being firmly seated on top of him. “N-No-- No, no, no, no!” Joseph yells, shaking his head back and forth. Ruvik observes him silently, watching as they seem to draw ever closer to a breakdown.

“Joseph-” Ruvik begins, voice stalled and gravely.

“No!” Joseph snaps. “Get off-- Get _off_ of me!” Finally Joseph bucks up again, and this time Ruvik wasn't expecting it, he immediately jolts forward, slapping a hand on Josephs’ chest to try and keep balance. His eyes narrow dangerously, annoyance practically radiating off of him as he reaches up, grabbing Joseph’s neck in one hand and _squeezing._ Joseph lets out a choked noise, and his head falls back as he tries to fight for air. Ruvik growls before reaching up with his other hand and digging his thumb into that shoulder wound. Joseph screams, arching his back to try and dislodge the other again, but through all his screaming and crying, he only really manages to jerk his hips upwards. While it's not enough to throw him off, Ruvik lets out a barely concealed groan and indulges himself just enough to roll his hips down against the detectives still-thrashing body.

Finally, after what was sure to feel like _hours_ to Joseph, Ruvik relents, pulling his hand away from both his shoulder and neck. Joseph gasps for breath, tears likely running down his face without his knowing. Ruvik, Not being one to break his toys so soon, lets Joseph have a moment to try and collect himself. His scarred fingertips drum down along the expanse of a pale stomach, before slowly taking hold of the hem of his slacks again, once the younger man’s caught his breath a little more. Joseph jolts slightly but otherwise keeps his eyes closed, breathing heavily still as Ruvik pulls the fabric down past his hips. He sees Joseph flinch just slightly, but otherwise, it seems like he’s just trying to keep steadily breathing.

Once his pants are out of the way, Ruvik re-settles on his hips, looking down at him with a fiercely pointed expression.

Joseph feels _nauseous._ He’s exhausted; sweaty and ready to let himself pass out. It feels like everytime he moves, it sends a jolt of pain through him in ten different places. He opens his eyes, and the world around him is blurry, yet even in this state, he can see Ruvik’s eyes piercing through him, searing his insides and mentally recording everything like some sort of fucked up science project. Everything hurts-- He needs to keep fighting but it _hurts._ He can’t even _breathe_ without it hurting.

Ruvik tilts his head to the side, leaning down until Joseph can see him clearly. In the sea of foggy thoughts, Joseph registers a cool hand cupping his cheek, forcing him to look up at Ruvik head-on.

“ _Submit to me,_ ” Ruvik whispers, lips barely touching his. “And I can make you so much more than _this.”_ He continues, and though he hates it, though he wishes it wasn’t true, Joseph desperately _wants_ to be anything but like _this._

He desperately wants out, desperately wants to not be so _helpless._ He didn’t want people to have to come and rescue him, even right now he resented the thought; A damsel trapped in the arms of the enemy.

“..Okay.” He finally croaks back, his stomach turning in something like burning disappointment. “ _Okay._ ” He says again, his words slightly slurred even while his vision begins to clear. Ruvik smiles, and leans back, dragging his hands down Joseph's stomach until he reaches his hips. He takes a deep breath, and Joseph watches as something like genuine contentment filters into Ruvik’s expression.

“Wonderful,” He purrs like a contented cat. Joseph shudder to imagine what exactly _that_ tone had to mean for him.

Joseph stares up at him, trying to blink past the stubborn blurriness still sticking to the edges of his vision. But Ruvik lowers himself again, staring into his eyes before he leans in, and closes the distance between them.

It’s not a soft kiss, but it’s seeking. Ruvik’s tongue tracing along the line of his lower lip before digging his teeth in and making Joseph jolt with a gasp. Their tongue slips past his lips, and Joseph lets himself be kissed. His stomach feels sunken, and his face is uncomfortably hot as he tries to let the disgust roll off of him, to no avail. But by far, the worst part of this all? He thinks he’s more disgusted with _himself_ than he is with Ruvik.

 _‘All you have to do is survive this, just keep surviving.’_ He convinces himself, his eyes closing as he furrows his eyebrows. Ruvik separates from him but doesn't go far, just pulls away enough to stare into Joseph’s eyes in a way that burns through the other man.

“Convince yourself of whatever you like, Detective.” No malice. Just an open invitation. Joseph’s blood boils at the impossible amount of frustration _that_ leaves him with. What, was Ruvik deciding to let him have comfort, now?

“Fuck you.” He spits, uncharacteristically venomous as he glares right back at him, watching his scarred lips turn up in a dangerous smirk.

“I’ll _consider_ it.” He whispers back, Joseph’s shoulders instinctively jerk up, making him hiss with pain as his shoulder throbs. His face flushes and Ruvik only chuckles at the look of pure _hatred_ Joseph gives him. Ruvik leans away, sitting up on his lap before pausing briefly. Joseph takes a breath, and before he really even registers what's happening Ruvik is pulling his pants the rest of the way off. He jolts in surprise at the cold air against his skin, but otherwise doesn't try to struggle, uneasily thinking back to just a few minutes ago-- how hard it was to scream, let alone _breathe_ when Ruvik plunged is thumb into--

He shudders and turns his head to look away, knowing that if he doesn't keep calm, he probably _will_ start vomiting, which, he already has enough problems to deal with without _that_ being one of them.

During his little inner-monologue, Ruvik finishes pulling his pants off, letting them drop to the floor to no-doubt gather dust as he pushes Joseph's legs apart, earning a startled noise from the younger man. He ignores it in favor of pushing those toned legs up, so his knees are bent with his feet flat on the table. Joseph’s face is noticeably flushed, but he’s biting back any remark in fear of disturbing the look of-- mostly normal-- intrigue on Ruvik’s face. Better to have him interested than angry, he supposes, watching them climb up to sit between his parted legs, once again, certainly an upgrade to being sat _on,_ in Joseph’s opinion.

“You don’t mind this,” Ruvik says, tone neutral. If Joseph didn’t know any better, he’d think Ruvik seemed just a little surprised by the fact. Joseph meets his stare head-on, feeling his want to fight return, and dissipate in waves.

“You--” He takes a deep breath. “You aren’t hurting me, li-like this.” He stammers, why is he still so out of breath? It’s as if he just can’t bring himself to calm down after everything, he’s flinching at every little move Ruvik makes as if he’s gonna just reach out and put him through hell all over again-- something Joseph is acutely aware he _can_ actually do. Ruvik chuckles under his breath.

“It’s so easy to pacify you.” Ruvik drums his fingers along Joseph’s calf muscle, dancing around the irritated laceration from before. Joseph watches him like a hawk, the very definition of uneasy as he tries to get a read on what Ruvik’s expressions mean. He wonders what this must look like-- He’s restrained to an operating table with his shirt and vest open, nothing but his boxers covering him up with his legs splayed wide open, and a madman happily seated between them. His stomach pangs again, and he looks away, fighting down the urge to vomit as he tries to swallow down the fear of whatever Ruvik might do to him now.

He doesn’t even respond to his claim, finding it hard to be insulted when it’s basically the truth. The only thing Ruvik really had to do to make him give up was hurt him a little more. That thought makes Joseph’s chest fill with guilt; disappointment readily bubbles up in his stomach, threatening to rise up until he has to choke it out in order to even stand himself.

Ruvik watches him, not-so-subtly enjoying the fact the Joseph is obviously tormenting himself. His hands come up to Joseph’s bare thighs, just idly running his scarred knuckles down the soft skin. He enjoys the half-second of terror that seizes Joseph’s body before he forces himself to relax again. Without much warning, Ruvik takes hold of one inner-thigh, and squeezes, knowing his ears aren't deceiving him when Joseph chokes out a small gasp. He continues further, by trailing his hand down farther, unable to help himself when he reaches out and squeezes him through those boxers, chuckling at the small yelp he startles out of the younger man. He watches the conflict in his eyes and smirks when Joseph looks away again, face flushed with shame.

“Eager? Or just shy?” He whispers, seeing Joseph’s barely registered glare before that expression shifts into one of shock as Ruvik licks a long stripe up his inner thigh, hearing the sharp intake of breath the other gives. “Oh, maybe it’s _both._ ” Ruvik grins devilishly, staring up at Joseph with half-lidded eyes as he leans in, and bites at his soft skin, chuckling when the other’s thighs twitch inward just slightly, as if wanting to either get away, or get _closer_.

There’s no real way to describe how Joseph is feeling right now.

Ruvik seems to feel smug about being between his legs, taking to almost _playfully_ biting at the insides of Joseph’s thighs up until his legs are twitching with the want to close; and even _then,_ even when Ruvik brings his hand under his knee, and pulls his thighs to close against his mottled neck, he immediately wants to leave them open again. _This_ feels too personal, too intimate-- Ruvik’s head nestled between his thighs as he continues to bite and lick at every inch of sensitive skin he can reach.

Even when he gives him what he wants, it’s somehow _worse._

In all of a split second, Joseph wants to vomit again. Watching the display with the same trepidation it would if Ruvik was about to take an _actual_ bite out of him. His stomach turns in distress, and the longer it continues the more uneasy he becomes-- Ruvik doesn't take a bite out of him in the end, and the more he focuses on it those touches are becoming… almost _nice._

Joseph turns his head away, closing his eyes. At this point, is he ever going to be clean again? He wonders, breath hitching at the feeling of calloused fingertips gently dragging up his outer thigh. Ruvik hums softly, shifting to nose along Joseph’s stomach in a way that has the detective drawing a shaky breath. His shoulder throbs when he turns again, and he feels nothing but disappointed with himself-- nothing but _disgusted_ with himself as he lets Ruvik part his legs again, running a scarred cheek against the front of his boxers. His cock twitches in his briefs and Ruvik lets out a soft sound of surprise. Joseph feels well past defeated.

Ruvik does it again, seemingly intrigued, and Joseph breathes in sharply, biting his lip when he sits up and replaces his cheek with one calloused hand, slowly rubbing him through his boxers.

Joseph shudders at how cool that hand is, even through the fabric of his underwear. He shifts slightly, uncomfortably aware of how Ruvik is watching his every move. If he’s trying to get him hard, it’s gonna be really difficult if he keeps _staring_ at him like that.

Ruvik chuckles and Joseph is once again reminded that he can probably hear what he’s thinking, too.

“A good observation, Detective.” Ruvik comments, smiling just slightly as he grips him through his boxers again. Joseph's thighs tense as he draws in a sharp breath, shoulders tensing up despite the throb of pain it brings him. “What was that? Something to say?” He asks, leaning down. Joseph’s leg jerks a little, but he tries to keep it bent the way it was before. Ruvik seems amused by his constant fidgeting, although it's embarrassing, it’s much better than if he was annoyed by it. Joseph shudders to remember what it was like to not be able to move even an inch of himself-- no doubt Ruvik could easily do it again if he wanted.

Ruvik tuts quietly, dipping his hand into Joseph's boxers before taking hold of him. Joseph flinches from the contact, cringing slightly at the feeling of thick, rough scar tissue sliding against his cock. After a few seconds, Joseph belatedly realizes that something… _slick_ is coming from Ruvik’s palm. He shudders at the thought and then shudders at the _feeling_ of it, all tingling warmth.

“You’re disgusted, but you won’t tell me to stop,” Ruvik comments, making Joseph look at him again. “You’re _afraid._ ” He murmurs, surprising Joseph when he’s suddenly speaking in his ear again. “-But you won’t cry for me, won’t beg me not to,” Joseph swallows thickly, eyebrows furrowed in something like confusion. He _had_ done all those things-- he’d screamed and begged and cried for it to stop-- and yet...  
  
Ruvik licks the shell of his ear, “ _Anymore,_ Detective. You won't do those things _anymore._ ” Ice fills Joseph’s chest and makes him recoil slightly. He isn't sure whether he should be terrified by that revelation, or relieved. Ruvik lays against him, chest to chest as he scrapes his scarred cheek down against Joseph's throat, feeling the detective tense, and then try to relax underneath him.

Joseph sags back against the table, letting his head fall back against the metal as Ruvik continues to just-- _touch,_ every part of him that he can. He lets out a breath through his nose and is startled when the icy feeling from before begins to grow warmer. Ruvik leans up enough to catch Joseph's eyes, unnerving him even more. That hand tightens around his cock, and Joseph chokes slightly when Ruvik strokes him again, disturbed by how… by how _good_ it actually feels. His thighs twitch as he shifts, heat flooding his face as he feels himself grow harder in Ruvik’s hand.

“H-hey--” He stammers quietly, looking up at Ruvik with wide eyes and furrowed brows. Ruvik only smiles back very briefly.

 _What’s going on?_ Joseph can’t help but wonder, trying to shift his legs again. Ruvik’s hand slides against him with ease, stroking him with an almost patient air to it as he circles the head with his thumb. Joseph sucks in a breath, shocking himself when he has to bite his lip to avoid groaning.

“It’s _okay_ , Detective.” Ruvik’s voice startles him out of his thoughts. “You’re alright, just let go.” Joseph takes a deep breath, unsure of whether or not this was really happening-- he’d thought about that a million times already, though. No, no, Ruvik had to be _doing_ something to him now-- there’s no way he’d feel this way on his own.

Ruvik chuckles against his throat, making Joseph shiver with the way it travels down his spine.  
  
“Oh, Detective. Your naivety is... _flattering_ .” Ruvik whispers the last word into his skin, scarred lips traveling up until they reach his adams-apple. Joseph flushes with the implication of those words. “What could I have _possibly_ done to make you feel so... Frustrated? Flustered?” He chuckles again, and Joseph hates how it just makes him blush _more._

Ruvik twists his wrist on an upstroke, grip tightening further. Joseph doesn't think he’d be able to stop the groan that escapes him even if his life had depended on it. Scarred lips drag along his throat, putting him even more on edge as he arches his back, trying to get away and get closer at the same time.

“Someone seems a bit... _conflicted_ .” Joseph groans in the back of his throat, closing his eyes as he lets his head loll to the side. “Come on, Detective.” Ruvik whispers, breath coming out in warm puffs against Joseph’s throat. “Submit to me. Submit and I’ll make sure you feel guilty for _every second._ ” He emphasizes his words with the drag of teeth against his pale skin. Joseph groans loudly this time, arching his back up again as Ruvik scrapes his teeth up his throat. It’s nearly insane to think he’s close to giving in, close to chasing after the warmth he feels building in his stomach even as it defies every bit of reasoning he has.

“I--” Joseph pants quietly, “I already _said--_ ” He tries to argue. Ruvik cuts him off.  
  
“You already verbally agreed, I’m aware.” He breathes, sounding like he was trying to explain something very plainly to a child. “Yet you still resist with your mind. You refuse to listen to your body.” He looks at Joseph very pointedly, eyes half-lidded and brows furrowed. He looks unimpressed.

Joseph shifts, squirms underneath that imposing look. Sebastian would have something witty to say now, something sharp and cutting and _unafraid_. Joseph isn't sure if he can pull that off here.

Ruvik scoffs quietly at the perceived silence, “Still so stubborn.” He shakes his head, abruptly moving to sit up again. “And _restrained_ , as well. I can feel how pent-up you are.”  Joseph gasps without the weight on his chest, not even realizing how much it had hindered him until then. He looks up at Ruvik with wide eyes, watching as they tug his boxers down. Ruvik takes his hand off of him, and Joseph bites back a whimper at the loss-- more startled by the fact he’d considered it a _loss_ at all.

“Stop,” Joseph whispers, closing his eyes as if pained. Ruvik tuts quietly in response, tracing one well-trimmed nail down the line of his stomach.  
  
“You’re so frustrated, so easily worked up…” Ruvik doesn’t stop. He continues to almost marvel at him. “I could sate that frustration. Or I could make it _worse_.” It isn’t a question, and Joseph doesn’t answer it. Ruvik seems to consider something, eyes never leaving Joseph’s while he does.

Silence weighs heavy between them for a few moments, making Joseph want to squirm with the unease he’s feeling as a result. Ruvik has a storm in his eyes, calculating something Joseph probably wouldn’t even understand if he tried. Joseph wonders if he actually _was_ supposed to reply, but before he can think of one Ruvik wraps a hand around the base of his cock, and surprises him when he leans down.

Joseph jolts at the feeling of him kissing his tip, the scarring giving him a brief cause to worry. Those rational thoughts melt away again when Ruvik takes him into his mouth, tongue flat against the underside of his cock as he swallows him down in one go. Joseph chokes on air, feeling like the breath was knocked out of him as his head falls back again, a loud moan parting his lips at the inviting heat surrounding him.

“R-Ruvik--” He gasps, thighs tense as he jerks his wrists in his restraints. The noise of them rattling startles him and he looks down at himself, only just remembering they were there in the first place. Ruvik hums around him, and Joseph yelps at the feeling, face immediately burning red from the shame that follows.

Ruvik slowly pulls off of him, eyes watching his expressions intently before he’s taking him back into his mouth. Joseph moans helplessly at the feeling, his chest tight with how hard he’s trying to hold himself back. Ruvik swallows around him, closing his eyes when Joseph throws his head back against the table, moaning loudly.

The next time Ruvik pulls off of him, Joseph finally admits that _yes,_ It _is_ a loss. Though he doesn’t have long to ponder that fact when Ruvik is already moving back up, re-settling over him as he had been a few minutes ago. Calloused hands spread his thighs apart again, and it shocks the air out of his lungs when Ruvik grinds down against him.

“Is it good, Detective?” Ruvik rasps in his ear, making him shudder and attempt to shut his legs. Ruvik keeps them open easily enough, chuckling in his ear at the feeble attempt. “It could be much, _much_ better if you’d only let it be, you know.” He drags his teeth over Joseph's earlobe, smiling when he flinches.

Ruvik rocks his hips against him, finally bringing his hands away from Josephs’ legs, and allowing him to close his thighs-- though he only manages to bracket Ruviks’ hips with them instead.

“Just submit to me, We both know it’s what you want.” He whispers against Joseph's jaw, dragging his nails up along his sides and making him squirm. “Let me take care of you, Joseph. I promise to make it all so, _so_ much worse.” He murmurs, biting down over the other man’s pulse. Joseph Jerks at the feeling, a low groan escaping his lips as his eyes flutter shut.

He arches up into Ruviks touch, and feels like something in him has been broken when he utters a quiet “ _Please_ ” into the air. He’s close to losing his mind if something doesn’t happen soon-- in fact, he probably already has.

Ruvik smiles against his throat at the admission, taking it as a good enough answer. He continues to rock his hips into Joseph’s, moving faster than before as he runs his hands up those pale sides, touching along the red welts he’d left behind from a few moments ago.

Only a few minutes in and Joseph is panting against him, head tilted back against the table with his eyes squeezed shut. He’s past the point of not believing this is happening, past the disgust and shame-- He _needs_ this. Needs to feel something that doesn’t _hurt_ like everything else has.

So, he rocks his hips up into Ruvik’s, panting and moaning underneath him because good _god_ does it feel good. The steady, solid warmth braced against him, he doesn't even think beyond that. Actively tries not to.

It’s only when he feels fingers swipe over his gunshot wound, does he remember it was even hurting to begin with. His eyes snap open as he looks up at Ruvik, shuddering when he runs his fingers over it again.  
  
_No, no no no, Not again._ Is all he can think before Ruvik shushes him, pressing his thumb to Joseph’s lips.

“Trust me, Joseph.” He murmurs, and no, _no_ . Joseph does _not_ want to do that, but he doesn’t get the opportunity to voice it when Ruvik ducks his head down again and slides his tongue over the wounds opening.

Joseph cringes away, whimpering in the back of his throat when Ruvik doesn't stop moving his hips. It’s a heart-stopping moment when he feels that tongue slip back into the wound, his eyes clenched shut, expecting blinding pain before opening in confusion when it doesn’t come. Joseph only manages a short gasp before realizing, _Oh, Jesus Christ, that feels good too._

Ruvik dips his tongue into the wound, and it’s got to be the weirdest thing Joseph’s ever felt-- but also one of the best. It didn’t _hurt_ , but it was a sort of intense kind of feeling, one that spread heat through his lower stomach just the same. Ruvik circles the opening with his tongue, and Joseph feels his thighs shake as he takes to rocking his hips up again, thoroughly relieved that it was _okay,_ that Ruvik wasn't hurting him anymore.

His breathing comes faster now, the heat building in his stomach driving him to tug at his restraints again. His head falls back down against the table as Ruvik grinds down harder for a time, making his thighs shake as Joseph attempts to mirror the action. His mouth opens in a silent moan, and Ruvik plunges his tongue into the wound. Joseph arches up, stomach clenching as he cries out, panting loudly in between moans. One of Ruvik’s hands come up to push his leg up higher, and Joseph retaliates by wrapping his legs around them.

Somewhere along the way, a hand finds its way into his hair, surprising him by yanking his head back far enough to bare his neck. Ruvik’s mouth leaves his shoulder, and he whimpers at the loss, only to moan again when teeth scrape up his neck, and clamp down around his pulse, tearing another cry from his throat. He hasn’t been this hard in his _life,_ so he knows Ruvik has to be doing _something_ to him-- and not just in the physical sense.

Something flashes in his mind, and then there is pressure there, encompassing and _noticeable._ Ruvik makes his presence there known, and Joseph almost feels better for it. His wound pulses suddenly, and it sends electricity down the length of his spine, leaving another shocked moan to escape from his lips.

Abruptly, Joseph realizes his wrists aren't being restrained anymore, and takes the opportunity to slide his arms around Ruviks neck, one hand cupping the back of his head, and the other clawing at the coat still clinging to his shoulders. The cloth is cool against his irritated skin, and he’s certain the welts on his wrists must be a sight to behold, but somehow he doesn't find himself caring.

 _'I could run.'_ Joseph’s mind crashes against the waves of sensation, making him falter. ' _I could shove him off of me and run.'_

Ruvik groans against him, jolting him when he darts up and captures Joseph’s mouth in a hungry kiss, seemingly startling the both of them when their teeth clack together, and suddenly Joseph isn’t thinking of _running_ anymore.

He moans against Ruvik’s lips, breath coming faster as the other practically devours his mouth. They break apart after a second, and Joseph whines, not even capable of being embarrassed anymore. The heat in his stomach drives him up the wall, it’s like there’s lava in his veins.  
  
“Please-- I-I--” He chokes out, barely able to speak as he clenches his eyes shut. Ruvik cups his cheek, tilting his chin up and this is it, there’s no going back now because Joseph is hopelessly, _selfishly_ wanting _more_ , wanting Ruvik to tip him over the edge over and over until it's a whole new kind of torture for him.

He ruts against Ruvik and feels like an animal for it. He feels like a pet being led around on a _leash,_ and yet somehow even that thought can’t manage to do more than make him shiver. It occurs to him that maybe that’s something he _wanted._ Ruvik wraps him up in his arms and presses at the barrier of his mind without force, it’s blissful, and Joseph welcomes him in with open arms.  
  
“That’s it.” Scabbed fingers closing around his chin, “ _Let go_ , Joseph.” Ruvik breathes, and if Joseph wasn’t so far gone he’d be surprised by the gentleness of his touch.

His fingers scrabble over Ruviks shoulders, clutching fistfuls of that ruined doctor’s coat before he comes against him with a sob, breathing raggedly as his thighs tense and his legs shake. Ruvik rocks against him still, and finishes only a moment later with a deliciously sharp groan against Joseph's throat, letting them both ride it out for a moment. Joseph lays panting against him, and after several minutes, Ruvik waits until the air around them begins to cool before attempting to pull away. Joseph manages to wrap his arms around Ruvik’s shoulders again before he can slip away to somewhere far off, away from what they’ve just done and the consequences it brings.

He buries his face into his shoulder, hearing Ruvik let out a soft noise of surprise and interest at the obvious attempt at self-comfort. The shame is back again, and Joseph is only a few minutes short of a breakdown as he digs his fingers into that coat.

The silence settles around their harsh breathing heavily, and either minutes, or hours tick by without Joseph noticing.

“...Why-- why would you--” He pants, voice coming out in soft puffs as he keeps his eyes clenched shut. Scarred fingertips card through his hair again, no longer grabbing or seeking anything except for the simplicity of the motion. Joseph sags against the table, feeling used and guilty and so, _so_ selfish for wanting _more._

“I wanted to.” He replies simply, his voice infuriating normal for what Joseph thinks should be a confrontation. “You seem to forget, Detective.” Joseph looks up at him, brown eyes meeting yellow as Ruvik cups his cheek again. “You’re _mine,_ to do with as I please.” He whispers, leaning down until their noses are almost touching. He tenses up from the closeness now, but doesn't pull away. He isn’t sure if he should feel reassured, or threatened by that sentiment, but Ruvik smiles at him again and tilts Joseph’s head back. He leans down, brushing his lips over the mark he’d left on his neck-- no doubt close to becoming a bruise.

“I’d say you please me well enough, _Detective._ ” And Joseph panics at that. It sounds like a goodbye-- Like he’ll disappear in Joseph’s arms and leave him alone to deal with all his horrible emotions at once. But Ruvik doesn’t leave yet, just pushes him flat on his back before settling against his chest. Joseph looks mildly alarmed and Ruvik has the audacity to _chuckle_ at him, pressing his cheek to that throat. “Relax, Detective. You’ll have plenty of time to ponder your guilt later.” Joseph shudders at that like it's a _promise._

“I-- I hate you,” He chokes out. He doesn’t know why he says it _now,_ but it hardly hinders the mood of the room. Ruvik hums noncommittally, mouth pressed to the skin of his neck.

“Of course. Convince yourself of whatever you like, Detective.” There’s that invitation again. Surprisingly there’s still no malice in Ruvik’s words, only inviting nonchalance, as if he knows it would _really_ make Joseph feel better.

Joseph doesn’t speak up again after that, he probably doesn’t need to; Ruvik hears everything he _doesn’t_ say, too. Maybe even better than the things he _does._

So it probably would be obvious, most of all to _him,_ that Joseph hated him like fire loved to spread.

And yet, he still felt guilty. Guilty for _what?_

“I can make it worse, next time.” Ruvik whispers against him, feeling the full-body tremor that Joseph tries to hide. He kisses his skin and can _feel_ all the guilt and shame rolling over Joseph in waves.

An unspoken ‘ _Yes, please’_ makes Ruvik’s lips curl into a smile.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This literally took nine months for me to finish. I started in March and just lost interest in TEW before eventually coming back. It's comical that it's the day before christmas eve, but hey, life is cool like that. It's also my first time writing any type of porn whatsoever, so please be gentle with my feelings
> 
> If you like this, please leave a comment!! If you want to leave a writing request that's fine too, just know that I might not get around to it unless inspiration really strikes me.  
> Just please god, leave a comment on this, it took nine months for me to make.


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